RIGHTS

A little caveat to begin with: in no way, form or structure is this missive intended as a slight on our admirable police force. Instead, I intend to find out what the law says about parading SUSPECTS to the public. I own a copy of the Nigerian Constitution, but I don't have a law degree. Someone does. Here's the angle of a legal beagle on the conundrum. Have a good read peeps:

"I am an apostle of succinctness, conciseness and clarity of write up or retort as my friend would say, i will practice what i preach. Let me start by saying every Man has legal rights as well as obligations, even animals have theirs. There are rights that stand above ordinary laws of the land and which is said to be an antecedent to the political society itself. These rights are so important that they were obliged a chapter in the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria 1999 (as amended) this is contained in chapter IV.  According to Salmons, a legal right may be defined as any advantage or benefit conferred upon a person by a rule of law.
The main purpose of these rights is to prevent disorder, breach and to ensure the presence of an outlet for the oppressed to seek redress and fair play in the temple of justice, thereby serving as the remedy against defects of police and those ugly things one finds in the body politic. This in the words of per Unurhoro JSC in Isagba V Ashiedu (1982) NCLR 784.
These rights as contained in the constitution covers all spheres of a purpose driven individual and further provides for it enforceability. These rights ranges from Right to Life, Right to dignity of human person, Right to personal liberty and other constitutional safeguards against arbitrary trial of suspects of crime. (see generally section IV of the constitution, get a constitution if you don't have one).
It must however be said that although these rights are specifically provided for and beautifully made, what comes to play in reality of our present society is the great influence and effects what is referred to as 'Nigerian factor'. This is a Nigerian line of reasoning and notoriety in orientation. As all breathing Nigerians would testify to, this Nigerian factor and mentality has eaten deep into all sectors and systems of the country. The Nigerian police being an important part of the system is alarmingly affected.
Just yesterday, an uncle of mine saw 3 policemen in their uniforms and thought aloud with the expression that the appearances, countenances and demeanour all shows how ill motivated and uninterested they are about the job, it is a job of last resort where no other job offer is present to many. The knowledge and qualifications aside, which i am not saying it is not of importance, one could easily draw a conclusion that they constantly set out to unleash their frustrations on members of the society.
Now to the issue of public parade of arrested person or suspects as criminals. It must be said that there is a difference between an arrested person, suspect and a criminal. One can be arrested for anything as arrest itself doesn't confirm the arrested person guilty or criminal.
In similar vein, suspicion, no matter how serious cannot take the place of evidence or facts and hence suspected persons cannot be convicted on mere suspicion.
However a criminal is someone that has been so adjudged or confirmed guilty of committing a crime by a court of competent jurisdiction. One then seems to wonder if Nigerians and Nigerian police know the difference between these 2 or 3 words as they are constantly abused in their usage.
Why do the police parade arrested persons publicly? In my own opinion which i am entitled to, i think it is a way of creating awareness and possibly notifying the family and friends of arrested persons of such arrest. This could further be to enhance and enable granting of bail "for free" in demanding circumstances. I wonder how unlucky and innocent people have been a victim of these malicious parades.
It is not only wrong to parade arrested persons around streets and town but it is also illegal and unlawful. There is a stipulated method of conducting an identification parade where the need arises. It is shameful to see our Police operate in such level. What happened to their duty to protect rights of members of the society, their " friends"?.
I must say that ignorance kills faster than a bullet in the head, members of the society need be aware of the existence of this right and how they can have it enforced. If individuals who themselves are law abiding stand against the breach of their legal rights, police will be forced to respect them and enforced such right. Why do you think they are petrified of lawyers.
Know your rights and don't die in silence."

->Abdulsalam Abdulateef (Lawyer)

---->>>>Cue (not a lawyer...)

CURIOUS

I am a particularly inquisitive boy. Always have been. I once took a stroll with a friend when she started laughing upon a sudden. I thought her mom's orogun had corroborated with a Babalawo to take her sanity. But no, she had noticed something written in Hausa on the wall of an uncompleted building. It said: "dump refuse here and DIE".
I lol'd and accepted the challenge. Why and how would someone die by dumping refuse. So I unwrapped a bubblegum, walked back 20meters, dumped the refuse beneath that writing -- that was 4years ago. In case you haven't noticed, I an not dead! Unless, of course, we're all dead and are now living in the world Bruce Willis lived in for 90% of 'Sixth Sense'.
I am not a teenager anymore (sobs), & I couldn't possibly reach such levels of preposterousness even if I tried, but I'm still very much a card carrying member of the skeptic's society. I just wanna know why, and how.
Why do the Nigeria(n?) Police parade alleged suspects before they are arraigned and convicted. Whatever happened to 'innocent until proven guilty'. That question has been getting my goats for quite some time. I (you) could very easily be in the vicinity of 'dem boyz' and be arrested with them. That is a mere coincidence in my opinion, but being paraded shirtless & in boxers is a different ball game all together.  Is it constitutional? Is it even legal? What does the law say about that!
Unfortunately, I'm no lawyer, so I can't give a definitive answer. Fortunately, I have a jillion lawyers around me and I've mailed three of them. If I get a response before noon tomorrow, that'll be the post of the day. If I don't, then something else. Until then.
A very good morning.

---->>>>Cue (Superstar, Gangster, Master blaster..)

BIBULOUS

How're you. Notice I didn't put a question mark in there? I think 'how are you' is only a greeting, not a question. Some would argue that you have to respond anyway, but that was rhetorical -- you don't have to answer; for I know you're fine & dandy. Else ways, you wouldn't be on this platform reading me bibulously make an argument against myself.
But if for some reason, you're not all fine & dandy, probably due to a flu of sorts, or you're going through a breakup or low finances or insufficient data balance or you are just plain depressed...its going to be alright. Whenever you're despairing, just remember that the worst fear you once had was the prospect of being flogged for an assignment you failed to complete in primary school! Point being; whatever you're going through right now, you'll definitely look back on it in some 3years and smile at the sheer impermanence of life's many challenges. You'll be fine.
That proviso over with, despite a perpetual lack of money in my account, its all shaping up to be a bloody awesome Sallah celebration. Big ups to the Nigerian Army; seems they're getting the upper hand against the You-Know-Who-s. Shout out to my eldest sister who marked her birthday on the 27th. Shout out to an old friend, Bc who marked hers on 'September 11th'. I reserve the biggest one for those who for one reason, or another, click and read. Gracias.
Finally, I think I might just buck a trend & post at least once daily for the next week. I feel remarkably happy and fired up. Never mind the positivity shit in the second paragraph..I needed that more than anyone.
That's it for tonight boys, and girls. I hope to see you people again tomorrow (just bookmark this thing already..lol). Much [unrequited] love from Captaincue. See you around.

             ---->>>>Cue (didn't know what bibulous means until about 5mins ago)

MY LIFE

I was going to post an essay, but decided against it. Why? Because I can! That's why. Lol. Gaskiya, I think books provide an esoteric collection of empirical knowledge, and with the purported dearth of 'reading culture' (whatever that means) I saw it fit to post another review. Spontaneity is the keystone in the structure of my blog, and 'book review' takes precedence over all other stuff this week. Bear with me, and enjoy:
SUMMARY:
MY LIFE is a 2004 autobiography of a certain Bill Clinton; former President of the USA. The book details; albeit chronologically, his childhood; growing up with grandparents in a little town Hope in Arkansas, coping with an abusive stepfather (whom he loved), highschool, Georgetown University, Oxford, Yale Law School (quite some education, won't you say)...being Governor of Arkansas..all the way to his Presidency of the United States.
PLOT
Not many people can lay claim to being the President of the United States. Being a nonfictional book, there's really no plot to speak of as its a true story. William Jefferson Blythe was born in August 1946, barely 3months after his father died in a car accident. Despite growing up with an alcoholic who was abusive, he still loved his stepfather; so much that he changed his last name to Clinton in his early teens. His involvement in politics was no fluke as well, because as a teenager in highschool, he was a prominent member of the Student government. Also, while attending a Government leadership program, he got to meet President John Kennedy in 1963.
He wanted, and he secured an admission into Georgetown University in Arkansas to study International Studies. Again, he got involved in Politics by working as an intern with a Senator William Fullbright -- because like himself, the Senator was against the Vietnam war. (A stick his opponents would use to beat him throughout his political career).
He went to Oxford via a scholarship, attended the University of Arkansas Law School and eventually rounded up his formal education by attending the Yale Law School.
Along the line, he worked some high profile jobs on campaigns and upon graduation from Yale, he secured a job as a staff attorney for a House Committee in Washington.
He was elected as the Attorney General of Arkansas in '76 and in '78, he was elected Governor of Arkansas. He was voted out of office because of some unpopular policies...and later reelected.
In a long and winding political career, he was elected President of the United States in '93. His most notable works were on healthcare reforms and national spending and assault weapons and several peace treaties. He also worked on Monica Lewinsky.
He left office in 2000.

MY VERDICT
Rio Ferdinand has 3 or 4 autobiographies, the lot of which are increasingly largely forgettable. Mr Rio apparently thinks an autobiography is a book in which you rat on your colleagues and mates. Just like Mr Ferdinand, Mr Clinton is a very popular man. Unlike Mr Ferdinand, Mr Clinton sure can write.
When a book is 969 pages long, and the title is not Les Misrablés , one would expect some rather long and unnecessary details...you get those in this book; what with the description of the wife of a barman and all such overkill.
In Nigeria, a politician is a bad man/woman (mostly). Before I read this book, I was of the same opinion myself but Mr Clinton's painstaking recollection and description of politics, polity and policies is  quite an eye opener. It gives the reader another perspective to view things from.
I particularly liked the part where he talked about his years at Georgetown; the classes, the papers, the writeups, the debates and all.
The man is a brilliant man, of that there is no doubt. But I know some people dislike him due in no small part to his history with infidelity (Monica Lewinsky) and some unpopular policies.
Apart from the sheer bulk of the book, my only ish is that he focused a lot on 'forgiveness' from Hillary (wife) and Chelsea (daughter) for his misdeed. That was rather disappointing. I guess maybe I wanted an X-rated, erection-inducing, swashbuckling recount of his escapade with that woman Lewinsky...and how she would hide between his legs, under that table in the Oval Office while he brokered a peace deal between Israel and Palestine. There was no such description. Lol.
All in all, an extramarital affair (or two), a bright (very) educated democrat, awesome speeches, alcoholism, abuse, a good insight into the sociopolitical makeup of the 90s, nostalgia, hope, Mandela, conflicts, Tony Blair, Arafat, Ebola, epithets and anecdotes ad infinitum -- makes this book an interesting read for nostalgic old people, an awesome guide for young peeps full of prospect and hope AND a timeless classic for lovers of autobiography.
As an aside, Mr Bill's professor said and he quoted in the book, and I'm quoting in my blog too, that "the future can be better than the past & each individual has a personal, moral obligation to make it so". Apposite!

MY VERDICT:
A truly good read (even if you're apolitical).

         ----->>>>Cue (..feeling my way through the darkness).

PS: I know a shitload of people read this blog, and I don't wanna go all Oliver Twist on you..but a comment here and there will be a lovely icing on my cake. Eseun

You Are Well Done O..

Its been raining goats and cows all week, and a loud thunderstorm woke me up around 3 in the night/morning. So I ate some coco-chops, sat at my desk, chewed on my pencil for a while -- wondering if/what I would post in the next week. I'll just draft straight from my phone.
Erosion control has been tedious and it took up most of my Saturday. No biggie though, just doing a little community service. But, is there anything more annoying than a passing vehicle honking at you while you're putting gravelly sand in spots dug by erosion? (No, there isn't) Why can't you just say "you are welldone o.." and drive off. Its disrespectful. Maybe I'll feel less bitter about it when I get my stiff back massaged by my girlfriend. Except that I don't have a girlfriend. I'm not a miserabilist sha, as I've learnt to start partitioning stuff. As instances; an unyielding girl won't affect my mood when grabbing a cold one with friends... Diamond bank mailing me (AGAIN!!) that I have 973naira doesn't mean my smile would be less brilliant. There's a lesson in there somewhere, I think.
Now I'm just going to play Scrabble against 'computer' until I beat it by 50points. The main post of the week will be an essay. Or a book review. I'll decide on Monday. Should be a good read, as is my prerogative.
Much love.

             ---->>>>Cue (..I no know say Silifa na heartbreaker..)

Ponmo

         As far back as I can remember, the concept of 'balanced diet' has been drummed into my ears. In my earliest years in primary school, Uncle (Mr Ibrahim)  had a diagram of a pyramid showing foods that provide protein. Meat and fish were atop the pyramid. Milk and eggs directly underneath... below them were cheese, soybeans (beske) and the likes.
One thing I never spotted on the pyramid was ponmo (cow skin). Ever since primary school, as much as finances would allow, I've always tried to balance my diet. You know; bread n tea, rice n beans, yam n egg. Even with swallow, one would try to eat with meat. Or fish (I don't like). Or cheese. Or God (didn't always) forbid, beske.
          Invariably, tough times came frequently and it was one of the unwritten principles of the family to NOT eat 'empty'. Ponmo was never the first option, it was always the last resort. Nutritionists would stress that it has no fattening properties. More staunch (wicked) nutritionists said it had no nutritional value whatsoever. But we still had to put something in the soup...and ponmo always, always came to our rescue.
Imagine the shock horror I felt when I saw on Linda's blog that the FGN was gonna ban ponmo. So I googled 'FGN and ponmo' and saw a news feed from Vanguard newspaper in which the Minister of Agriculture Dr Akinwunmi Adesina, represented by Dr Ademola Raji summarily said that he commends the National Institute of Animal Science (NIAS) for its programs that promote value addition in livestock -- (fair enough, but wait for it) -- as AGAINST sale and consumption of primary products alone, PARTICULARLY with the issue of CURTAILING the widespread CONSUMPTION of hide and skin as PONMO -- which OUGHT to be TANNED INTO LEATHER for a very high dollar return to the farmer and the tanneries.
          In this context, 'curtail' is an euphemism for ban. Gaskiya, I don't think this is an either/or kind of situation.. there should be no absolutes here dear Minister. We can eat ponmo and still make leather -- we only ever really have to increase livestock production. Am I missing something here?! Why are these people so shallow. Why do you have to do something controversial just to let people know you're in office. Ponmo didn't do anything. We know it has no nutritional value, but many a great idea has been conceived over plates of hot, spicy ponmo and a cold bottle of stout -- plus the illusion it gives a vast majority of families that their soups aren't empty is reason enough for me (to NOT 'curtail' it).
          For Ponmo's sake, isn't this a democracy? Should what we (don't) eat be determined at the whim of a man seemingly intent on doing something so incredibly rash, patently unnecessary and downright injudicious. A little poem I saw on twitter to wrap up the rant:         
      "Why are we banning ponmo,
         Ponmo never hurt anyone,
           Ponmo never embezzled,
             Ponmo never ran for President,.
        Ponmo never abducted schoolgirls."
    And it was ever thus.
              
                               ---->>>>Cue (Dear ponmo, you are not alone//I am here with you…)

AS E DEY GO

I'm guessing you're alive and well. My hair is two weeks past due for clippers. I don't know why I told you that, I just felt like I should share something personal with y'all. I've said it before but lemme just reiterate that I don't have high hopes of/for this thing...I merely wanted to gratify a gnawing curiosity. And I have. 'Captaincue; proud founder, owner and CEO of captaincue's blog' sounds good, does it not!
Really, at the beginning, I envisaged that by the end of 2014; 5months after the birth of this blog, I might be able to get a hundred views at the entirety of my posts. Yet, here we are, a little over two weeks after I drunkenly made my first post from a tiny cyber-café in metropolitan Ilorin, there's been a cool 463 page views. *sobs*
I don't usually get emotional about these things, but what is happening?!!!! Now I can no longer pretend this thing doesn't matter coz for some reason, it does. It got me to thinking: more readership, more observations, more criticism, more kudos and more obligation on my part to do right by this thing. And most of all, the more glaring my mistakes (grammatical, codification) will be. Its bloody exciting people.
Shout out to my friends who share the link. Shout out to the peeps who click. Shout out to Emeka for clothing me.  Shout out to my brother, and sisters. I've not exactly fulfilled a dream....which kid dreams of becoming a blogger?!!!!! I'm happy though. I'll end this episode here before I start crying.
Wow. Thank you all. Until later...
--->>>Captaincue (oya j'ijo Shoki)

BOURNE

Evening all. My book reviews will consist four parts;
1. Vague summary of the book.
2. The Plot.
3. My Verdict.
4. My rating; on a scale of bloody-awesome to fucking-awful.
Here goes:
SUMMARY:
The book of discourse today is BOURNE IDENTITY -- the first installment in the original installment of a trilogy (its been continued by a number of authors since Robert Ludlum's demise). The Bourne Identity is a 1980 spy-fiction-thriller resplendent in action packed, espionage-filled themes that tells the tale of a certain Jason Bourne; a chronic amnesiac with no recollection of his person and no vestige of his past, save for a microfilm (this was 1980, remember?!!) and a Swiss bank account holding a cool $5m.
As Mr Robert Ludlum is wont to do, he takes the reader into a very energetic, highly charged amorphous world of a complex man whose psychobiological configuration is so different to the everyday man it almost belies credulity. Almost.

PLOT:  
The preface contains two 1975 'real life' write-ups about Sanchez Ilich Ramirez ominously dubbed 'Carlos the Jackal'.
  In a world infinitely more chaotic than mine, a man is fished out of the Mediterranean sea in Marseilles where a degenerate doctor stitches him up and he wakes without any solid recollection of his previous life. Only clue he has is a microfilm which leads him to Zurich where several attempts are made on his life. He escapes, survives and instinctively adapts to goings-on around and about him. In a bid to piece together his fragmented life, circumstances lead him from Marseilles to Zurich to Paris where he meets and befriends a Canadian economist in an obligatory love twist to the story.
Bourne has spasmodic recollections of a turbulent past. He speaks several Mandarin dialects and is so well versed in disguise, combat and weapons of all sorts he would put Jack Bauer to shame.   He (and his increasingly prominent girlfriend) must escape death traps from both the CIA and a ruthless assassin (Carlos) who possesses a super network of highly motivated comrades -- while he tries to make sense of his life.
MY VERDICT:
By now, everyone must have seen a movie or read a book about the many covert operations of the CIA the world over. If you haven't, this is a good place to start. In my honest opinion, The Bourne Identity gives the reader a firsthand knowledge of what goes on in the dark labyrinthine world of a spy and the life and death decisions he has to make on a daily basis.
Mr Ludlum does a brilliant job of describing the combats, the weapons and the characters are a complex bunch.
If you are not a fan of conspiracies, you'll find the book a little tedious and curse Cue for not warning you about a boring read.
If on the other hand you love spy stuff, you'll love this one. Amidst all those spy-yey guff, there are some hardcore lessons applicable in the nonfictional world.
The book offers a course in bribery, concentration, focus, resilience and animalistic desire to survive through some quality epithets. Do yourself a favour, and read a copy.
CUE's RATING:
BLOODY AWESOME.

There you have it. Now I'm hungry. Have yourselves a bloody good rest of the week.

--->>>Cue (bookish fiend)

Quick quickie

I received a couple of mails from incepting fans of my blog highlighting their inability to comment on my posts. Not to worry dear friends, Captaincue has solved the unseemly quandary. I adjusted the setting such that if one is not the proud owner of a Google account, you can now comment as 'anonymous'.
That over with. I know what the critics say, but I hope Chinua Achebe's (God rest his soul) 'THERE WAS A COUNTRY; A PERSONAL HISTORY OF BIAFRA' is an honest-to-God unbiased and objective historical/autobiographical recollection of those events. I look forward to the read as I bought it with the last Naira in my wallet.
I had/have a friend. A girl. A female....of the opposite sex. She's petite and opinionated. I asked her out on Friday. She shakara-d me...but I'll keep working on her.
I look forward to having a perfect  week. My definition of a perfect week is: >>No chores (at all). >>One in which my parents travel. >>No pain in my right knee. >>Hanging out with friends. >>Reading a good book. >>Writing a short, short story and adding a chapter or two to my novel.
But I won't have a perfect one. If I have three of the above, it'll still be a good week by my reckoning.
The main feature of the week will be a book review. It should be bloody awesome. Till then....(or sooner)..

--->>>Cue (Fine boy, Better pikin)